just a mom

Today I got to be just a mom.

Not a fitness instructor.  Not a friend to get together with.  Not a mom zooming around.   No clocks.  No reminders.  Just a mom.

And I loved it.

We hung out in our pjs all morning.

We made music in the kitchen with spice shakers, old wood spoons and the bottom of a grill pan.

I baked in the kitchen with Hunter at my feet.

We took a stroll to the grocery store for a few items, which actually turned into a run since the rain picked up getting Hunter a bit wet.  Whoops!

There was lots of snuggling, reading books, and me getting a bit teary thinking about my little guy (hormones…).

It was a beautiful day and not like one we’ve had in a while.

I was scheduled to teach a class, but luckily found someone to cover it.  I just needed a day.  A day to just be a mom.

I can’t actually remember the last day I was just home with Hunter.  No plans.  I teach 1-2 classes a day, except on Sundays, but on that day Jacob is home and we have church, so it’s just not the same.  With classes in the mix we’re always on a schedule.

I’ve always wanted to be a stay at home mom, and now that I am/have been, I realize, I don’t really stay home.  Hunter and I are always on the go from one gym to another, or back home then out again.  We run errands in between everything and occasionally throw in a play date, although those are becoming a bit of a rarity with these busy days.

My struggle: I love everything I do.  All of my classes, all my participants.  It’s what I’m passionate about!  But what do I love more?  Being a mom.  I feel like I’m taking it for granded.  This time when Hunter’s little and calls ‘maaa-maa’ when he’s sad or can’t see me is fleeting.

All this has been weighing on my heart lately.  Lindsay’s post on no longer being a zoom zoom mom (<—– read it) brought it even closer to the front of my mind.

I don’t really have a plan for change.  Maybe I’m just being a bit selfish with all my teaching.  It’s what I want to do, not what I have to do.  Do I need to make a  change? Or maybe every once in a while I just need to take these days.

To just be a mom.

Because there really is nothing better.

Heather